You don’t have to be a stay at home mom to be a good mom.

(And the photo of this couch relates to that, just give me a minute).

I’ve spent the past 5 years staying home with my kids. And to be honest, I haven’t enjoyed it.

This isn’t some sort of complaining post, so don’t come at me. My goal is for it to be hopeful for mamas in the thick of little bitties and the monotony of staying at home with them.

When I decided to be a stay at home mom, it made the most financial sense for our family of 3. Then we became a family of 4 and I didn’t see the sense in going back to work.

So I stuck it out at home. And I really, truly struggled. I tried really hard to be a mom that I’m not. I’ve been them all: the crafty mom, the educational mom, the home made every meal mom (this one was my shortest stint), the do all the activities mom, the keep the neighborhood kids mom.

I thought I needed to be the “perfect” mom. And I blame myself for that. I fell into the lies of society (and the patriarchy) that say you must be Carol Brady in order to be a good mom.

And that’s a complete load of crap in case you’ve made it this far.

Do I love my kids? Absolutely. Do I want to spend every single moment of my life with them? Hahahaha no.

My kids are in pre-K now. I have two days a week to myself. So I’m back to working a part-time, flexible schedule that still allows me to be Mom first.

And let me tell you - my mental health has never been better.

It took a lot of therapy and self discovery for me to realize that I can do motherhood my own way & still be a good mom. I can still be the mom my kids need and deserve AND be true to myself in the process.

So, back to the couch.

I bought a couch today. By myself.

Something I couldn’t have done 5 years ago as a stay at home mom.

And I felt like I was coming full circle.

I wouldn’t trade the 5 years I’ve had at home for anything. I’ve learned so much! About myself, my kids, my relationships, my faith, and my marriage.

Those 5 years were an immense blessing.

But they were also the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

So if you’re in the thick of mothering little babies at home, know that it doesn’t last forever. You will, one day, feel a bit more like yourself again.

You do not have to prescribe to all the motherhood lies the world throws your way.

Find your avenue of motherhood & own it.

(And if it includes a couch, even better I say!)